A guy was telling his friend that he and his wife had a serious argument the night before. "But it ended," he said, "when she came crawling to me on her hands and knees." "What did she say?" asked the friend. The husband replied, "She said, 'Come out from under that bed, you coward!'"
“Fools find no pleasure in understanding but delight in airing their own opinions.” Proverbs 18:2
I understand that most married couples have disagreements from time to time. That’s okay. Not that giving permission is going to change that a bit. We don’t have to feel guilty about conflict, it’s what we do with the conflict in any relationship. Conflict helps us grow and get stronger, but if we’re unkind and selfish, we’ll not grow from the conflict. This verse tells us that it’s foolish to be more interested in being heard than attaining wisdom and understanding. Selfishness distorts our values and motivation. Communication is not really the problem in marriage or politics; it’s our motivation for communication. There’s plenty of communication, way too much communication on social media and television, but too little understanding!
When we delight in the Lord or love the Lord with all our heart, we want our communication to bring honor and glory to God; we want wisdom and understanding. When our motivation is just to be heard, we sacrifice wisdom for selfishness. Wisdom does not come naturally, we must want it and seek it. Selfishness, on the other hand, does come naturally. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. So, this is our choice, a love and reverence for the Lord or our love for the sound of our own voice. It seems like everyone wants to be heard or is dying to be heard, but who is listening to wisdom? Who is speaking wisdom? We’re bombarded with wisecracks in a desert of wisdom. Even believers are looking for the waters of wisdom and understanding in this barren world instead of seeking the Giver of Wisdom. “The Lord gives wisdom; from His mouth come knowledge and understanding.” Proverbs 2:6